we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
