Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
