Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
