4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
