I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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