yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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