Say something about gay babies.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
