no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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