i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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