This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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