Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
