Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
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