I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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