i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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