It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
