12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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