you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
North Korea, Best Korea!
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize