HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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