Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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