I heard we made out
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
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