just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
Randomize
