Just fell off a train. Bad.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
