TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
