There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
