how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
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