real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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