I heard we made out
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
this is an emotional support booty call
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Randomize
