And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
