Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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