the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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