ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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