you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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