do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
