It's like God shit irony all over that family
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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