literally had 100 drinks last night.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
