turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
