I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
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