Did you just see the Batmobile???
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
