oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
