I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
