But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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