we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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