we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
