Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
