Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
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