I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I deserve to be covered in dicks
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
