I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
