hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I just had sex on a roof
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
