i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I skipped work to stalk him.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
