omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
